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JipsyNeighbors' "Banana Phone"Remember that “Banana Phone” cartoon that exploded a while back on Newgrounds, and all the other various flash animation hosting sites? It took an obscure song by Raffi, set it to crude and simple animation, and laid onto it casual swearing and gratuitous violence. It was chuckle-worthy, I will admit, and the titular song became a staple internet meme almost overnight. That was years ago. Now, it’s tired old garbage with no place on the internet other than as a weapon for utilization by audio spammers on Counter-Strike. However, the fact that it’s no longer relevant [or even mildly amusing] didn’t stop this recently-formed children’s comedy troupe from making a complete live-action remake of the cartoon, long after the joke has passed. And what’s more, it’s not even of a decent production value. Who could have seen that coming?
Before we even begin tearing apart this video, let us first come to know our band of brothers [or “Neighbors”, rather] a bit better: The video description and their responses to comments on the video demonstrate their reluctance to swear so frequently. In their defense, they state that it is a “part of the original cartoon”. Nevermind the fact they could just as easily have rewritten the lines to make them family friendly, if they detest cursing so much. If they are so reluctant to curse on camera, than why base your video on an animation that includes so much fucking swearing in the first place? It’s not as if they were held at gunpoint and forced to film this horrid film, using the exact lines from the original cartoon. You either edit the lines, or find a new fucking script to work with: It isn’t all that difficult, children. Trying to come up with a fitting analogy for this video, I came up with this: Remember that awful 1998 version of Psycho, which seeked to be a shot-for-shot remake of the original Hitchcock film? Remember how every film critic lashed out against director Gus Van Sant telling him how pointless it is to recreate a film shot-for-shot, and how awful his film was for attempting it? Apparently, these kids aren’t familiar with this story of film and failure, as their short film attempts a similar tactic with similar results. Flashing red frames, audio ques, and every line of dialogue is recreated to the best of their ability; For what it’s worth, they stick pretty close to the original cartoon, as far as the more major details are concerned. What the video fails to do is provide decent camerawork, audio mixing, competent acting, or anything resembling quality. The editing work is sloppy at best. Within the first ten seconds of the video, we are treated to the “flashing color” overlay [as seen in the cartoon] failing to actually fill the frame, a mistake which is not corrected in future occurrences of the effect. There is inconsistency in the time between lines, at times having little more than a second between each character’s dialogue, and at others having to sit through the same shot of an actor seconds after his line has been delivered. When it comes time for the big finale, with our character in the white t-shirt [originally a gray tank top] beating to death the character with the tie, you might even be caught off-guard by just how haphazardly the shots are thrown together. It’s almost unwatchable based on these grounds alone. But of course, the torture doesn’t end with terrible editing: We must endure terrible acting and delivery as well. The line delivery is so forced, I’m almost convinced the actors actually were held at gunpoint and forced to perform. From every aspect to the body language and the tone of their grating voices, no shred of quality is spared and no scrap of competency is left for display. Luckily, the voice track is so low in comparison to how loud the song is, that you can just barely hear how badly they are acting. The only positive note I could write was that they managed to avoid looking into the camera when the shot didn’t call for it. So, congratulations for that, I suppose. I must pose the question, who was this video made for? Fans of the original cartoon? Fans of dated internet memes? Fans of shot-by-shot reenactment films? Judging from the comments, I suppose the film has managed to make it’s mark with the demographic that matters most on the internet: The blissfully ignorant. Get a load of some of these gems, if you please.
What does this unwarranted appreciation by those unworthy to judge mean in the long run? Fueled by the “positive reaction” from the Youtube community, this miserable group of unfortunate adolescents will continue to produce videos, and pollute the internet with their abysmal projects. They’ll most likely figure that they hit a goldmine with “reenactment videos”, and continue to make movies based on dated internet fads. These imbeciles need to be stopped before they hit it big, and make profit for their pitiful performances. |
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